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ALI ZARRIN
Interview with Ali Zarrin by Jim Cohn, June
16, 2010
Iranian-American poet Ali Zarrin immigrated
to the USA
in 1970. He graduated from Boulder High School in Boulder, Colorado, and
received a BA in English from the University of Colorado at Boulder, MA in
English Literature from University of Colorado at Denver, and Ph.D. in
Comparative Literature from the University of Washington in Seattle. A teacher,
critic, translator, orator, and prolific poet and writer, his books of poetry
in English are Desert, To an Alien, Modern Marriage, Made You Mine America and The Book of I. His books in Persian are In Place of
Every Bullet (out of print), From
Qadesi to the Lowlands, Kermanshahnameh, and My Suitcase. Ali lives with his wife in Denver. His Selected English & Persian Poems (1970-2010) will be published this fall.
Jim Cohn: Can
you talk about how you first became interested in poetry and your own early
development as a poet?
Ali Zarrin: I
was born in Kermanshah, Iran in 1952. Kermanshah is an ancient city
in the west of Iran
whose population today exceeds one million, but in the 1950s it must have been
around 100,000. Two major ethnic groups
lived in Kermanshah at that time: Kurds who had mostly moved into the city from
the surrounding villages and Persians who had emigrated from other parts of Iran. The majority of my family
were Persian merchants and had emigrated from Central Iran, namely, Isfahan, to Kermanshah. Only my great grandfather was native to a
village near Kermanshah and was actually a
Kermanshahi Kurd born in the region of Kamareh and Kazzaz near the ancient site
Taq Bostan which dates back to the Sassanid dynasty of 1500 years ago. Now with this brief family background I will
answer the question.
My earliest exposure to poetry was through my grandmother
Gohartaj Sabbaq singing ancient folkloric tunes of the Kurds both as lullaby or
just singing them in a blues style to sooth her own soul. She had been married off at the very young of
13 and none of her close relatives had survived, so that she basically knew few
people from her past. Her parents were
from the ancient city of Hamadan or Ecbatana. Although she was Persian in origin she still
knew these Kurdish quatrains that were in nature, tone, and subject matter very
close to Baba Taher Oryan’s poetry. Baba
is considered the first major Kurdish poet but he is also very popular in
Persian and considered a major poet.
Through my grandmother’s voice I learned the beauty of poetry and its
relevancy to our lives––its soothing and therapeutic nature. Her dad was a prominent merchant in our town
and opened the first fabric factory in Kermanshah. She married my maternal grandfather whose
forefathers were related to the Qajar dynasty and according to my mother owned
black slaves. Grandmother was not
educated but she loved this type of poetry which she had learned by word of
mouth. On the other hand, her husband,
my maternal grandfather was educated and well-versed in the classics of Persian
poetry and literature, especially Hafez, and as a child I would play a poetry
game called “Mosha’ereh” with him. My
young aunt and I would challenge grandfather’s vast memory of poetry with an
open book. And of course, he was always
faster than us in coming up with a response.
Later, after he passed on, and he died young at the age of 64, my young
aunt married a very young and promising poet Asghar Vaghedi who became a major
influence on me. Vaghedi, who lives in
the USA now and only a few blocks from me, later became the Secretariat of the
Iranian Writers’Association and one of Iran’s better known poets, at least up
to the years following the revolution of 1979.
I was only 11 when my 16 year old aunt married Asghar who was 21 years
old and just out of college and working as a teacher where he met my aunt. Asghar introduced me to modern Persian poets
and in particular to the modern poetry of Nima Yushij. My aunt was actually my childhood
playmate. After their marriage they
lived with us for a short while. This
was in 1963 and at that time modern poets were still unknown and Nima was
condemned for tinkering with a millennium old classical Persian poetry of Hafez
and Sa’di.
Initially, I began imitating the modern poets just like my
Aunt did. I even saw Asghar duplicating the forms used by the modern Persian
poets such as Nader Naderpur. Not much
good came of this early practice for me.
I only wrote one or two bad poems with this exercise, but one of these
early poems was good enough to grab the attention of one of my other uncles and
my father and they asked Asghar to conduct a test and see if I really had any
talent in writing poetry. Asghar gave me
4 words, as had been the custom, to see if I could use those 4 words and come
up with a poem. I went to the next room
and within minutes the words poured out of me and this was the first good poem
I wrote which later on was published in a children magazine and won me an
award. I was in the 5th grade and I had
a very good teacher, Iraj Shekarchian, who recognized my talent as well and
rewarded me with numerous awards mainly in the form of books. So at age 13 I was already published. I ran
our school’s candy store, barber shop and photography dark room and was very
close to this teacher who also secured for me a reporter’s card for one of
Iran’s two children magazines––Ettela‘at-e
Kudakan. This relationship was also
phenomenal for me because impressed with the way I read my compositions in
class and my voice, with this teacher’s blessings I was designated the orator
of our school prayer each morning which was in Persian and very universal in
tone and meaning. I performed this
prayer at the outset each morning and became extremely good at it. In other words, I set the tone for the
school’s day with my performance. Thus I
was aware of my oratory power and performing ability at a young age.
Around the same time I participated in a theater
production which was organized by one of Kermanshah’s
earliest professional actors and directors, Mr. Qolamhosain Nadji. I helped with all aspects of set production
but I was also a souflor as well as
an actor in a short barbershop pantomime comedy sketch as a sideshow and comedy
relief to the main drama at hand which was a melodrama. Still in elementary school, I had a very
active life and single-handedly also produced a wall magazine with feature
articles and comedy. In this wall
magazine I introduced Iran’s
first modern poet, Nima Yushij. So, by
the time I went to Junior High, I was well underway in my writing career. I soon had a short story published in a
literary paper edited by my uncle and there I was still a teen-ager publishing
work alongside grown-ups and experienced poets and writers. At that time I had already made up my mind
that I wanted to be a poet/writer, but as I said I also acted in school theater
productions and even painted and drew.
By the time I was in the 10th grade I had published a host of poems in
some of the major magazines of Tehran, attended some major plays on their
opening nights, met a few of Iran’s well-known poets and writers. From 9th grade on I lived in Tehran
and attended one of its best schools, Alborz, which had been founded by
American Presbyterians at the turn of the century and was known as American College.
Before I go any further let me also say a word about my
parents: my mother loved reading books and my dad resorted to the poetry of
Omar Khayyam anytime he wanted to comment on the deeper meaning of life and its
transience. They didn’t finish high
school, but loved education and learning, always regretting the fact that their
parents, despite being well-to-do, did not allow them to continue their
education. They were liberal minded and
upwardly mobile, so to say. My mother
had planned to send me to one of Iran’s
finest boarding schools and they did just that and when I was ready to leave Iran, they also
rose to the occasion and made it possible for me to do so. We were a middle-class Iranian family and
these types of expenditure such as tuition for the boarding school or an
airline ticket to the USA
were exorbitant for them. By sending me
to the boarding school in Tehran, in effect, they gave me the opportunity to
develop my character and my talents in a larger pool of possibilities: meeting
people from all over Iran, exposure to many more cinemas and theaters as well
as bookstores and poetry readings––things I dearly loved. So, I am very thankful to them for these
early sacrifices they made to propel me forward and send me to places that they
had never seen.
On my father side too I had an uncle who opened the first
theater/cinema in Kermanshah and was an
actor/poet in his own right. He never
seriously pursued his acting or his poetry but he was very talented. He did not have the academic opportunities
and training that I had. On the other
side of my family, my mother’s older brother Hooshang, whom I loved very much,
was a painter, a dulcimer player, and an amateur writer in his later
years. He published a book of his
thoughts on life and death in three languages: German, English, &
French. [This same uncle became very
successful in business in Germany
and supported me financially during some of my college years.] So, poetry came to me because so much of it
was around me. My family was relatively
cultured, but they were mostly merchants and poetry was not a way to make money
as it is not in the USA. Poetry was also a very well-respected
national art in Iran. In the USA
we build monuments and mausoleums for our political leaders and in Iran we have
done this for our poets such as Ferdowsi, Sa’di and Hafez. But just like in the USA where we assassinate our beloved presidents,
in Iran
we have starved, exiled, jailed and killed some of our beloved poets like Ferdowsi,
Eshqi, Farrokhi and others.
So you see, both my social and familial upbringing
were conducive to making me a poet, but I was also predisposed to the
brooding and moodiness of a poet. I had
lost a brother to meningitis before I was born so that I was born to parents
that had experienced tragedy. My mother
suffered from depression and she still does at her ripe age of 85. I had to live with this disease that runs in
my mother side of the family and was imbued with it to a degree. Poetry was a great therapeutic tool. Indeed, it has saved my life. I saw its healing powers in my life and I
latched on to it. It has been part of my
everyday day life now for the past 47 years.
Of course, in those early days I never thought that I would become a
bilingual poet, but as soon as I became aware of Iranian writers who wrote in a
foreign language–– like Fereydun Hovayda whose debut Book, Les Quarantaines (1962), was the first book by a non-French writer
to be nominated for the Goncourt, France’s highest literary
prize. Also, later, when I learned about
Samuel Beckett, who wrote masterfully in two languages, I knew that I too could
do it and when I arrived in the United
States in 1970 at the age of 17 and still in
high school I knew that soon I’d be writing poems in English.
I flew directly from Tehran
to Denver and then went on to Boulder.
I was still in high school. In
hindsight, I see that it was a very tough journey, but I was young and very
excited about coming to America
and living on my own. In January of
1970, I began my studies at Boulder
High School where I had
an encouraging English teacher. She was
very nice to me and since even back in Iran I had begun with the Beatles, Roy
Orbison and Bee Gees, I built on that and began reading every song I had heard,
and every poem or play that I had already read in Persian. As they say, the rest is history. I started writing poetry in English as early
as a few months after I arrived. My
first English poem, “Dimensional Journey“, was published in 1972 in my
college’s annual literary magazine, Progenitor,
at Arapaho Community College. This was also due to the encouragement and
support of a brilliant English teacher Otto Pfeiff with whom I have kept
contact over the years and consider him a dear friend and mentor. He wrote the afterward to my first English
book of poetry, To an Alien
(1985). A side note to the publication
of this book was the fine piece of writing that was written about it in the
Rocky Mountain News by a University
of Colorado Professor Peter Thorpe.
Professor Thorpe also wrote about my second book of poems, Modern Marriage, in 1994, and published with the article one of my
poems.
In 1971, another important event in my life influenced and
changed the course of my poetic development.
I believe it was March or April of 1971 when I participated in an
anti-Vietnam war march in Denver. The march ended in front of the Capitol
building where demonstrators made speeches and musicians played songs. There I met Allen Ginsberg. He was sitting on the lawn and I just walked
up to him and introduced myself. I was
only 19 years old at that time and I had already read about Ginsberg and his
glorious trip to Prague
in a Persian literary magazine called Khusheh
edited by Ahmad Shamlu––a great Persian poet.
I told Allen that I had read some of his poetry and we knew about him in
Iran
and of course he was very pleased.
Perhaps I was the first person who told him about his work and life’s
reflection in Iran. Well, he was very kind and receptive. He invited me to visit him at his downtown
YMCA room where he was staying and this was the beginning of a long
relationship that lasted throughout the rest of his life. There were periodic interruptions in our
correspondence or meetings, but his friendship and poetry continued to be an
important force in my life. First of
all, as early as 1971 and right after meeting him I bought all his poetry books
such as Kaddish & Howl.
Of course, I had difficulty relating to some of his poems such as “Howl”
at that time, but there were others that spoke to me directly and I remained
intrigued by them as they were very different in tone, rhythm and subject
matter compared to the Persian poetry of Iranian contemporary poets, so, I kept
reading and rereading them as I attended Allen’s reading at University of
Denver in 1972 where we met and talked again.
Nevertheless, I was still too shy to present to him any of my
poems.
In 1982 I published an English poem named “Origin” in the Bloomsbury Review which I had written in
1978 and it was and still is a good poem.
I think this was the beginning of my seriously good work in
English. By then I had graduated with a
BA in English from the University of Colorado at Boulder
and had begun thinking of America
as my new home and my parents too had immigrated to the USA. I became a US citizen in 1976. On the other hand, in 1980 I published a book
of 45 poems in Persian entitled In Place
of Every Bullet which included works from 1968 to 1980. This is only a year after the Iranian
revolution and many of the poems had political overtones, but nevertheless I
made sure to include a few lyrical poems as well. By 1981, the so-called Spring of Revolution
was over and I was never able to visit Iran as my friends warned me that
the Mullahs had taken over. In 1982 I
published an English scroll poem named “Ghazal” which sold wherever it was on
display. “Ghazal” is a love poem as the
genre in Persian has always been, but this was a very non-representational and
abstract poem unlike the dominant trend in American poetry which tends to be
specific, particular and representational.
Naturally I hand-delivered a copy to Allen’s mailbox at Naropa in Boulder and before long
Allen wrote me a letter which he himself later referred to as a poem. He told me this on more than one
occasion. I published his letter in my
second English book of poems Modern
Marriage (1992), and Allen made sure that the source was mentioned in his
extensive and authoritative bibliography edited by Bill Morgan and published by
Greenwood Press (1995).
Of course, in this letter Allen was advocating William
Carlos Williams’ edict: “No Idea but in Things!” So, it took me a while to actually arrive at
that and test drive this method and this type of
poetics. I think some of the poems in Modern Marriage are a testament to this
utilization and combination. By the time
I published Modern Marriage in 1992, I had already been married and fathered two sons. I felt well-rooted in the American soil,
especially since I married an American who had a connection to and a root in
the Choctaw Nation of Oklahoma and early share-croppers in Arkansas.
Allen had seen versions of these poems prior to publication and offered
editorial comments and suggestions. He
even commented in a letter to me that he thought that with these poems, my
poetry had improved and here he meant in comparison to my abstract poem
“Ghazal” which he thought to be “terrible“.
At least that is what he told me once on the phone at that time. Of course, I knew that my “Ghazal” has
reached its audience and was and is basically a good
poem. Since its publication, I have seen
and heard that it has been read over and over at weddings and funerals––what
greater honor can a poet hope for?
Strangely enough I have published the title poem “Modern
Marriage” in two slightly different versions.
In the book Modern Marriage I
published it with my own writing and reading––my own voice and music. In the anthology Premonitions (1995, Kaya Publications) I published Allen’s trimmed
down version. The great editorial skill
of Allen, at least in regard to this poem, was that he did not even add or
suggest a word; he merely trimmed the words that he thought did not belong or
that they were extra. Of course, this
way the poem’s music changed––it became jazzier; whereas in my version I
maintain a different music––a little more melody line and a softer tone and
tempo. In hindsight, Modern Marriage was a very seminal work
for me and for my relationship with Allen.
I think in many of the poems of Modern
Marriage Allen could see how simplicity and clarity can be the driving force behind language and poetic imagery––something that
could make our poetry more accessible and yet still keep the complexity and
sophistication. In his letters, Allen
also advocated to me the poetics of Basil Bunting whom I believe he had met in Italy when he
visited Ezra Pound. Allen wrote to me
Bunting’s advice to poets: “Concentration and condensation.” This was very helpful and I absorbed it, but
I had a message of my own for Allen which I had
learned from the great classics of Persian poetry such as Ferdowsi, Attar, Baba
Taher, Rumi, Sa’di and Hafez: “Simple but Sophisticated.” I think I even took that a step further: I
wrote poems that were no longer “poetry” or “poetic”. They did not use the signals and tools that
often signify to the reader that “Beware, you’re reading a poem!”
I think at this point, by the time Allen had read a good
number of my poems I might have had a poetic gift for him in return. If you read Allen’s Cosmopolitan Greetings and compare some of its poems to Modern Marriage you will see the traces
of my gift and my kinship to Allen. Of
course, Allen still continued to be very critical and steadfast in his
“imagistic” poetics of the earlier years.
He was steeped in that and this type of poetics exercised a great power
over him. That is why when I moved back
to Colorado in April 1994 and met with Allen
in Boulder in
June, I presented him with my newest and most exciting long poem “Made You Mine
America!” Well, Allen still felt compelled to be the teacher and went on to
work on this poem. I never forget the
experience. I had already committed the
poem to publication in the Literary
Review for their special issue on the poetry and literature of the Iranian
Diaspora. Of course, I was excited: I
had used Allen’s name in this poem and this was a poem that I had revised
nearly 700 times. So, by the time I
presented it to Allen, although I was very interested in knowing his view, I
was basically “done” with the poem. Soon
I found out that this is not what Allen thought.
As he got in my car to go shopping at the Goodwill store
and have lunch together, I saw him in the passenger seat next to me penning my
poem: his ink striking lines and words and this time suggesting imagery and
ideas. Of course, I had a very enjoyable
lunch with him. He only edited 3 or 4
pages of my 7 page poem, but when I got back home and looked at his editorial
comments, all of my body/mind simply refused to change anything in the
poem. My poem was finished––for better
or worse, my work was done and it represented me and my life story. It was still simple but sophisticated; it was
powerful because it was true to my experience, strength and hope. Incidentally, this is my most anthologized
poem to date. It must have been
published in more than a million copies so far.
Nevertheless, Allen played a major role in my development as a poet, but
I believe that I became fully independent of him as of 1990. He had great respect for my Persian literary
heritage––the poetry of the Persian classics.
Of course, there were always my Persian poems and writings
and my presence in the Iranian literary scene abroad and to some smaller degree
in Iran. By 1994, I had published my second book of
poems in Persian and my works, despite the immense censorship, had received
some attention in Iran. I am mainly referring to two articles that
were written & published about my work in two of Iran’s leading literary magazines,
namely Asghar Vaghedi’s in Kelk, and
Dr. Faramarz Soleimani’s article in Donya-ye
Sokhan. Then just as important in
1990 and 1992, my wife and I were hosts to two of Iran’s great poets: Ahmad Shamlu
and Manuchehr Atashi. I actually
organized Atashi’s readings & introduced him around the USA and read
with him at his pleasure and insistence some of my own poetry which was
received warmly and enthusiastically. I
have always felt very fortunate to have an active presence in two cultures and
two languages.
I would like to also mention that my first book of poems
in Persian brought me two good letters of criticism from two other of Iran’s
established poets. Mohammad
Azarm, now living in exile in France, who had mainly criticized the liberties
that I had taken with Persian meters, and Mahmud Azad Tehrani, now deceased,
who recognized gradual but certain progress in my work and saw it as “achieving
its goal.” Azad’s letter was a
landmark for me. Although what he had
written was something I had practiced in the past, it made me determined to
pursue it even more seriously. Azad
wanted me to experiment with the old forms and then begin to de-form, as he put
it, or reconstruct them. Because of his
gentle voice and encouraging remarks, I took this to heart and went to work. I also took advantage of the opportunity of
having immediate access to an older Persian poet in Boulder, Dr. Mohammad Nakhosteen, who knew
the classical forms in Persian poetry very well.
I had met Dr. Nakhosteen as early as 1970 in my poetry
class at Boulder High where he was a guest lecturer, but it wasn’t until 1980
that we became close friends and he performed the role of a mentor to me. He had already translated and published
several of the major classical Persian poets, namely Hafez, Sa’di, Khayyam,
Khaju, Baba Taher, Hatef and others, and was writing Persian ghazals nearly
everyday. I helped him compile his
selected works which he dedicated to me and used him as a critic for my ghazals
written in the old rigid style.
He had been a close friend of Mas’ud Farzad one of Iran’s early
20th-century poets who was well versed in English poetry and one of the
founders of a literary trend called “the group of four” whose
most internationally prominent figure was Sadeq Hedayat. So, this connection also was an important
one. I worked with Dr. Nakhosteen for a
couple of years during which time I wrote almost a hundred ghazals. Unfortunately, his life was cut short and
while in hospital for a surgery he died abruptly. Dr. Nakhosteen was a self-made man who had
come to the USA in 1922 with
19 cents in his pockets and yet he had finished his studies at Yale, Harvard
and Columbia. After his death his wife entrusted me with
his unpublished manuscripts and writings.
Among them are letters written to him from John Dewey. Well, he was by profession an emeritus
professor of history and philosophy of education. He also taught me about how to handle my life
and unbridled passions. He was a good
mentor.
Another important influence was Dr. Ahmad Karimi-Hakkak:
this was a double-pronged influence since our relationship was mainly academic
and lasted throughout the time that I pursued and completed my Ph.D. in
Comparative Literature at the University
of Washington. I chose to study with him because of his translations
of Modern Persian poetry and his first-hand knowledge of and acquaintance with
some of the Iranian writers and poets at that time. Of course, the whole Ph.D. program was very
useful. At UW I also met and worked with
Nelson Bentley who had studied under W. H. Auden and was a friend and colleague
of Theodore Roethke. Among other
distinguished academics that I worked with was Hazard Adams. I also had the opportunity to meet with
Edward Said and Wolfgang Iser.
Unfortunately some of these people are no longer with us or in my
life.
I would be remiss if I would not mention my poet friend
Dean Brink who was my classmate at the University of Washington. We also shared Nelson Bentley as a teacher
and mentor and soon in 1995/96 we co-edited an internet international literary
magazine called Interpoetics—a term
that I coined for the type of poetry I was writing at the time. Over the years from 1987 to nearly 2007––a
period of 20 years, he was always a good reader, editor and critic of my poems
and wrote a few thought-provoking pieces about my work which
are available online.
I must also speak of two other major influences and
friendships in my life: the first came in the form of meeting Anne Waldman in
1994 and presenting to her my Modern
Marriage. She responded with a kind
and encouraging letter in which she wished to see more of my Persian life and
Persian mind––at least that is how I read it.
Well, this was a great spark for me and the result was “Desert”––a long
poem that has not received the attention that it deserves, but it is a poem
that did just that. It juxtaposed my
past and present––my past as an Iranian and my present as an American. Of course, these divisions are not as clear
cut as they seem––the fact is that I am both and neither simultaneously, but
that I have an active present and participation in the Iranian literature of
the Diaspora and nowadays with the advent of internet and e-mails, also in
Iran. In other words, Anne showed me by
encouragement how desirable and accessible my past is––the past that is indeed
so present in my mind and life.
The other major friendship and influence was that of
Lawrence Ferlinghetti. Again, the very
day in 1971 after meeting Allen Ginsberg that I went to the bookstore to buy
Allen’s books, I also picked up A Coney
Island of the Mind and I read it as many times as I did Howl or Kaddish. It probably left a
greater impression on me than either of Allen’s works, but I did not meet
Lawrence Ferlinghetti until 1996 at Naropa’s Summer Writing Program where I was
offering a workshop in Ghazal writing and gave a poetry reading. Ferlinghetti could not attend my reading as
he arrived the next day, but Steven Taylor who introduced me to him had already
told him about my reading and the warm response I had received from the
audience. That summer I sent a poetry
manuscript to Lawrence
and soon received a response in which he had put his finger on a crucial point
in my poetry: by referring to a line in one of my poems called the “Complaints
of a House-Husband”, he showed that, generally speaking, my poetry tended “to
avoid I”. He
too wanted my Persianness to coalesce with my Americanness and he asked me in
his letter to write a work like that and send it to him for publication.
I took this as a great occasion to start my long work The Book of I which I dedicated to
Ferlinghetti and in 2004 finally finished it and sent it to him. In 2005, he edited it and chose 3 sections
from it and published as a Broadside on the City Lights website. This was indeed a wonderful achievement for
me––it felt like by then I had completed the circle from the point of arriving
in America as a teenager and meeting Allen to the point of meeting his first
major publisher and poet friend Ferlinghetti and having a long poem edited and
published by him. Needless to say, I was
overjoyed. In 2006, with Felinghetti’s
blessing, I published “The Book of I” as a hard copy
Broadside, but this time I included 3 of his letters to me consisting of his
first reaction to my poetry and then two of his letters explaining the
processes that he went through in order to edit The Book of I.
Of course to the list above I must add a host of Iranian
and world influences––poets such as Nima Yushij, Forough Farrakhzad, Ahmad
Shamlu, M. Azad, Manouchehr Atashi, Mehdi Akhavan Sales and then all the great
Persian classics: Ferdowsi, Khayyam, Rumi, Hafez, Nezami, Attar, Sa’di, Baba
Taher, etc… It is really a long list. In
the last nearly 50 years, I have tried to read poetry from all over the
world––including Folk songs and lyrics.
In the same vein I must mention the great admiration that I always felt
for the American modernist poets such as Ezra Pound, T. S. Eliot, and William
Carlos Williams. Eliot was first, but he
did not last as long as Pound and Williams did.
Nowadays I am very picky about what I read and of course poetry is
always at the top of my list.
After all said and done, perhaps the most significant
contribution to my development as a poet, came from my
wife Carolyn Adams who is a good writer in her own right. She has remained to be my most staunch critic
and editor––always demanding from me truth, more truth, and nothing but truth
when it comes to poetry and to my writing.
She has also grounded me deeply in the reality and life of a parent
raising a family. Somewhere along the
line I decided that I want to have a functional family free of alcohol and
drugs. Fortunately this happened early
on in our marriage. I wanted to be there
for my boys like few artists and poets had in the past due to their addiction
and alcoholism. I chose to be clean and
sober and this has been a bigger savior in my life than even my poetry.